Existential angst "This time we are dealing with a particularly difficult case," Mr Weber says on the phone. "We parted company with Mr. Rosin this morning. He recently found no acceptance among the management and his colleagues. However, we are now seriously concerned about Mr. Rosin and his family.He built two years ago. His spouse is currently putting her job on hold due to the birth of their third child. The couple had been frequently imagining lately the bleak future that would come after the husband lost his job. I would like to ask you to make an appointment with Mr. Rosin right after we speak on the phone."

Confidence I have known Mr. Rosin (age 43) for several years. He is the head of finance, accounting and controlling at Nova Maschinenbau GmbH in Bremen. My call to him confirms the decidedly downbeat mood. We make an appointment for the next morning together with his spouse. Over a cup of coffee, I listen to the couple's needs and worries. They both expect to have to sell their house. Later, when he has blown off enough steam, I steer the conversation to his past experiences at Nova and at his two previous employers. He starts to talk, I ask with interest, confirming him non-verbally in his account (active listening). Within a few minutes, the heap of misery turns into a cheerful, enthusiastically narrating manager, who physically stands up and presents previous professional success experiences with an expressive voice and body language. He forgets his presence for a good half hour. Of course, it then catches up with him again. But the reality of his successful past also remains in his consciousness.

Old job in transition Mr. Rosin had actually been brought to Nova by a recruiter via direct approach a good 3 years ago and had done "a good job" here at first. However, when 2012 ended on a distinctly negative note, a frosty climate soon spread. Assigning blame and washing the slate clean were on the "hidden agenda". Mr. Rosin, as a good professional, was no match for this. His figures and analyses in the charts presented were regularly slated by the other departments and countered with their own figures. Finally, his performances were no longer acceptable either. Two days later, in my office in Hamburg, we worked out Mr. Rosin's professional successes, his professional and personal strengths, and his special experiences and created a "sales folder" within 14 days.

Strengths and weaknesses He is amazed at the positive content. "Yes, but now I've been kicked out and frankly, rightly so. My appearances over the last few months have regularly ended in disaster. Who else is going to hire me as a commercial manager under these circumstances? They're asking Nova, too, aren't they?" "Sure, we have to expect that. We'll put your strengths and your proven track record as a manager in your sales folder. Your weaknesses in dealing with power and as an in-house politician will be addressed intensively over the next few weeks. In the process, we will also work through your recent traumatic experiences. We also need to find a position where assertiveness is not a top priority. You will find your way to assert yourself in management teams. Incidentally, in the interview they need a real answer to the frequently asked question about your weaknesses. How convincing do you think it will be if you present in a self-critical yet confident way how you are working on your skills in dealing positively with the power factor?"

Team Ms. Rosin is a very important part of this process. We invite her to participate in one of our sessions in Hamburg. She integrates herself into the positive working atmosphere and keeps her husband's back free in our process. Mrs. Rosin thus becomes an important member of our team working on her husband's professional reorientation.

New start The targeted coaching towards assertiveness runs parallel to the application activities - jobhunting. One problem is still to get Mr. Rosin into the interviews with a positive charisma. Of course, existential fear and memories of the recent past catch up with him from time to time. A little trick from my training helps here - the anchor technique. This anchoring also works very well for Mr. Rosin. After a little more than three months, he has two offers from companies that he can easily reach by car every day. The salary is at the same level as before. Today, he is still happy working for the new company.